robotmoxie:

secondhand embarrassment is pure agony and i wish a lot of comedy didnt rely on it

dankmemeuniversity:

profsplosion:

unadulteratedpiratepizza:

unclefather:

SCP 3008

The wording of this indicates this was two different crimes

assclapping-deactivated20191201:

buttermilk-thegoat:

teathattast:

He was considering mischief but fell over instead

That’s my last brain cell

Toocute

geoclaire:

snakegay:

i think golf should be punishable by death

It destroys ecosystems, pollutes waterways with pesticides, strips out local plants and replaces them with a monoculture, needs to be watered, takes up land in cities which could be uses for housing or food production AND it’s played by rich white assholes

incorrectsterekquotes:

Sheriff: come on Derek, no one thinks any of the pack members are your kids.

Derek: alright. *turns to the deputies* raise your hand if you thought Isaac was my son

Everyone: raises their hands

Sheriff: alrigh- Jackson, Stiles and Isaac why are YOUR hands raised?

incorrectsterekquotes:

Agent McCall: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

Stiles: No.

Agent McCall: [covers up mic] What do I do?

incorrectsterekquotes:

[HALE PACK EDITION]

Would never stab someone: Derek Hale

Would stab someone out of retaliation: Jackson Whittemore, Vernon Boyd

Yells “I won’t hesitate, bitch” First: Cora Hale, Stiles Stilinski

Would stab someone without warning: Erica Reyes, Isaac Lahey, Allison Argent

Would stab someone as a warning: Malia Tate, Lydia Martin

incorrectsterekquotes:

Stiles: you look like my first husband

Derek: you’ve never had a husband before

Stiles: exactly